Ask the Experts: Toddler Teeth Brushing Advice from Dr Annie Smith and Dr Mary Baptista
Toddler

Ask the Experts: Toddler Teeth Brushing Advice from Dr Annie Smith and Dr Mary Baptista

Health & Wellbeing

Ending the tooth brushing battle…

When it comes to brushing toddler teeth, even dentist mums aren’t immune to bedtime stand-offs and rushed morning routines. Dr Annie Smith and Dr Mary Baptista, founders of Little Brushies, know the reality all too well. Alongside busy dental careers, both are raising two children under the age of four, giving them firsthand experience of the teething troubles, brushing battles and daily juggle that comes with caring for tiny teeth.

Inspired by their own family experiences, the duo created Brushi Bear™, a gentle, child-friendly toothbrush designed to make early oral care calmer, easier and even a little more fun for young children and their parents. Together, Annie and Mary bring more than 35 years of experience across preventive, general, cosmetic and implant dentistry, with a shared mission to help families build healthy habits from the very start.

Here, the dentist mums share their top tips for making toddler tooth brushing less stressful, more effective and easier to build into everyday family life.

Image supplied by Fuse PR | Toddler teeth brushing experts
Image supplied by Fuse PR | Toddler teeth brushing experts

Tooth brushing often becomes a battleground with toddlers. Why do young children resist brushing so strongly?

If you pause and look at it through toddler eyes, it’s actually quite intense. Someone much bigger than you is coming towards your face, asking you to open your mouth, putting something unfamiliar inside it and moving it around. That’s a lot of sensory input and very little control.

At this age, autonomy is everything. Toddlers are wired to practise saying “no”, it’s how they learn independence. So when brushing feels like something being done to them rather than with them, resistance is completely developmentally normal. It’s not naughtiness, and it’s not a parenting failure.

We also see sensory sensitivities playing a big role. The taste of toothpaste, the texture of the bristles, the noise of an electric brush, even the sensation of lying back can all feel overwhelming. Some children are especially sensitive around their mouths, which can make brushing feel even more intrusive.

As practising dentist-mums ourselves, we always reassure families: resistance doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. It simply means your toddler is learning independence and brushing has landed right in the middle of that stage. With consistency, calm repetition and a bit of creativity, it does get easier.

Image supplied by Fuse PR | Toddler teeth brushing experts

From your experience working with families, what usually turns brushing into a struggle, and how can parents prevent that from happening in the first place?

Brushing often becomes a struggle when it’s introduced suddenly or when parents have felt pressure, perhaps after a dental visit or when more teeth appear. From a child’s perspective, it can feel abrupt and overwhelming.

Another huge factor is tension. Children sense when we’re bracing for a battle. If brushing already feels stressful, they respond to that energy.

Prevention is really about early familiarity, low pressure and developing healthy habits. Let babies explore a brush before you even “need” it. We created Brushi Bear™ to turn one of the biggest toddler battles, brushing teeth, into something calm, predictable, and even enjoyable.

Instead of wrestling a wriggling toddler twice a day, Brushi Bear™ works with your child’s development, not against it. By making brushing feel safe, structured, and consistent from the start, Brushi Bear™ helps babies and toddlers build positive habits early, before fear or power struggles ever take hold.

How can parents introduce tooth brushing in a way that feels natural rather than forced?

Start early and keep expectations tiny. Before teeth even arrive, let babies hold a brush. Make it familiar long before it becomes functional.

When that first tooth appears, think exposure rather than perfection. A few gentle strokes are enough at the beginning. Tone matters enormously. “Let’s tickle your tooth!” feels very different to “Open wide.”

Brushing alongside your child is powerful modelling. Toddlers love copying.

With Brushi Bear™, the nursery rhyme timer becomes part of that introduction. It signals, “This is our brushing song,” rather than “This is something being done to you.” When brushing feels like part of a loving routine, especially one that has a clear beginning and end, it becomes far less confrontational.

Many parents rely on distraction, like songs, videos or games. Are these helpful tools or do they sometimes backfire?

Playful tools can be wonderful, especially songs. Music creates predictability and structure, which young children thrive on. It also helps with language acquisition.

Where it can backfire is when screens become the only way brushing happens. If brushing is entirely dependent on external distraction, it can be tricky when that tool isn’t available.

We prefer engagement over pure distraction. Count teeth together. Roar like a lion for the back molars. Let them brush their favourite teddy first.

That’s also why we built a two-minute nursery rhyme timer directly into Brushi Bear™. It supports routine without needing an extra device. The music becomes a cue, not a crutch. The goal isn’t to trick children into brushing, it’s to help them feel involved and safe within a predictable pattern.


Image supplied by Fuse PR | Toddler teeth brushing experts

What does an ideal baby or toddler brushing routine look like, especially when mornings and bedtimes are busy?

In real family life, “ideal” must be realistic. Twice daily brushing with a smear of fluoride toothpaste is the gold standard, with bedtime being the most important.

Morning brushing might have to be short and cheerful. Bedtime brushing benefits from a bit more structure and should ideally happen before overtiredness sets in.

Tools that reduce friction help enormously. A double-sided head like the one on Brushi Bear™ allows both upper and lower teeth to be cleaned at once, which is reassuring if it is a struggle to achieve the recommended 2-minute brushing time. The inbuilt timer also removes the mental load of clock-watching, you simply brush until the song finishes.

Ultimately, it’s consistency over perfection. A calm, repeatable brush-book-bed rhythm builds lifelong habits.

Is consistency more important than technique in the early years? What should parents prioritise if time is short?

Consistency is the foundation. In the early years, building the twice-daily habit matters more than flawless technique.

If time is tight, just make sure fluoride toothpaste touches all surfaces of the teeth, especially along the gumline and back molars. Those little molars are real cavity hotspots. Technique will improve naturally as children grow and their mouths become easier to reach.

This is why we recommend age-appropriate electric toothbrushes for this age group. Manual brushing relies on perfect technique, which can be tricky with wriggly little ones. An electric brush does more of the cleaning for you, making it easier to clean teeth effectively even if compliance is limited. Brushi Bear™ builds on this, the double-sided head covers more teeth in each stroke, giving you confidence that more of the mouth is cleaned even if time is restricted. It makes brushing calm, simple, and even a little fun, so healthy habits start early without stress and everyone survives bedtime with their sanity intact.

What are your best tips for brushing a child’s teeth when they won’t open their mouth?

First, stay calm. We know that is easier said than done at the end of a long day, but escalation rarely helps. Try turning it into play: roar like a lion, hiss like a snake, pretend to blow out candles. These simple games naturally encourage little ones to open wide without it feeling like a command. A bit of silliness often works far better than a firm instruction.

Offering limited choices can also make a big difference. Something as simple as, “Shall we brush the top teeth or the bottom teeth first?” keeps the boundary clear because brushing is still happening, but it gives your child a sense of involvement. They feel heard rather than overruled.

Image supplied by Fuse PR | Toddler teeth brushing experts
Image supplied by Fuse PR | Toddler teeth brushing experts

Are there particular positions or approaches that make brushing easier and more effective?

Absolutely, positioning can make all the difference when it comes to brushing little teeth.

If your child is resistant, brushing face to face can quickly turn into chasing a very determined and surprisingly strong moving target. A much easier and calmer approach is to sit them with their back against you, almost like a gentle bear hug. You can wrap one arm around them for reassurance and stability, and use the other hand to brush.

This position gives you much better visibility of their teeth, keeps little hands from grabbing the toothbrush mid clean, and most importantly, still feels safe and comforting for your child. It helps turn brushing from a battle into something far more manageable and often much quicker too.

How can parents balance encouraging independence with making sure teeth are actually cleaned properly?

We all want to nurture independence, but we also want those teeth properly cleaned.

In the early years, children simply do not yet have the hand control and coordination to brush thoroughly on their own. Even if they are very capable in other areas, effective brushing is a skill that takes time to develop.

A lovely way to approach it is “your turn, then my turn.” Let them start. They can explore their toothbrush, copy you in the mirror, practise the movements and feel proud of doing it themselves. Then, when they are finished, you gently step in to complete the clean.

Framing it positively makes a big difference. You might say, “You’ve made a great start. Now I’m just going to check we’ve chased away all the sugar bugs.” It keeps the tone light and collaborative rather than corrective.

This approach protects their growing independence while still making sure their teeth are properly cared for. It becomes something you do together rather than something being done to them, and that small shift can make all the difference.

And finally, what are some gentle ways to build confidence around brushing for children who have had a negative experience?

When brushing has become emotional, it is often a sign to gently pause and reset rather than push through.

Go back to basics and make it playful again. Let your child brush your teeth. Brush their favourite teddy’s teeth together. Turn it into a game where you “hunt” for sugar bugs hiding in the corners. These small moments rebuild familiarity without pressure.

It can also help to lower expectations for a short while. Focus on positive exposure rather than perfect timing. A calm 30 second brush that feels safe is far more valuable than a tense two minutes.

Sometimes a simple change of toothbrush can shift the mood entirely. A child-friendly design such as Brushi Bear™, paired with the same nursery rhyme each time, can help brushing feel predictable and reassuring rather than overwhelming.

Above all, stay steady and calm. Children take their cues from us. When brushing feels consistent, safe and gently guided, confidence almost always finds its way back.

See more Ask The Expert advice here.

Carly Glendinning

Article by Carly Glendinning

Carly heads up all editorial content at Absolutely Mama. She started her career in womenswear, but swapped handbags for highchairs when she became the editor at a well-known luxury childrens’ e-tailer. After that she worked with dozens of independent children’s brands on their editorial and continues to be big on supporting small, mama-run businesses. Carly and her husband have a young daughter and they have recently moved out of East London to the Kent coast.

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