If you haven’t been there you’ll never understand…
Words Holly Kirkwood
Breastfeeding is different for everyone – some people love it, some people hate it, but if you’re successfully feeding your baby all by yourself, or combination feeding, you might recognise a few of these…
1 It hurts
You can’t believe your nipples have been designed for this sort of thing. If they’d been designed for this sort of thing they’d have been made of titanium
2. Your breasts will become enormous
You thought your boobs were huge when you were pregnant? Ha. Now they’re not only enormous, but also rock solid. As if they were made of actual rock. But they’re not. And that’s weird
3. Your boobs can also be completely different sizes.
Yes, if you’ve just fed from one boob, and the other is still building up its supply you can be a 34A on one side and a 38DD on the other. Finding appropriate underwear can be a challenge.
4. Breastmilk can shoot out of your breasts at hilarious, unexpected moments, like lasers in Hollywood films.
Which is fine if you’re on your own in the shower; hell it’s quite funny actually. Less so when your baby unlatches when you’re having coffee with a pal and it sprays all over their lap
5. People you’ve known for years who have not had a child, or all men, will not know where to look when you’re feeding your baby
You want to say to people ‘It’s ok. It’s a natural thing, you don’t have to look in the opposite direction!’
6. The thirst is like nothing else on earth.
You are literally so thirsty every second of every day. And hungry, day and night. If you have a nursing chair, make sure its pockets are stuffed with snacks and water bottles.
7. Some women can make pints and pints of milk.
If you’re lucky enough to be one of these ladies, who can feed and express the extra, it’s just amazing to see how much milk the human body can produce in a day. Wow.
8. Crying babies, not even your own, can cause your boobs to just leak milk.
Yup, all over your clothes, right through that nice shirt you were wearing, or a dress at a wedding. Your body is not your own
9. The face your baby makes after its fed, when it’s finally all full up and satisfied, and you lay him down for a sleep, is one of the most blissed out faces you will ever see.
Awww. It’s heartbreaking.
10. Breastfeeding is one of the most amazing, difficult, incredible, weird and intense experiences you will ever have.
Just don’t try and explain it to your father-in-law, while feeding his grandson. He won’t know where to look.